Semi 1 - Dress rehearsal 1

Welcome from the Media Centre!

Below is a picture I took yesterday - today it's of course more crowded. Shrinkflation is also hitting Eurovision as both the arena and the media centre are the smallest I have ever seen (the arena from the outside at least). Still, around 1,000 journalists and bloggers should be able to do their thing here.

And to answer euro's question on the MB: this is where I'll be watching all liveshows!

(Pictures are mine.)

I have joined the Belgian contingent and against our own will we are surrounded by the huge Dutch delegation here. Yes, they are already loud and obnoxious and yes, we are already quietly annoyed, as good Belgians are.

Meanwhile, water and coffee are free here in the media centre but other foods cost an arm and a leg. Yesterday night I paid 32 CHF for a very mediocre burger and fries outside the city centre. Pretty sure Jacques and Lolita wouldn't approve.

More importantly, the first dress rehearsal starts around 15:30 CEST during which I will be blogging away here and at Songfestival.be. All accredited press can follow it from within the arena. Let's see how juggling two liveblogs in two different languages will go. What could possibly go wrong, right?

Live from the media briefing taking place in the media centre: it has been confirmed that the announcement of the finalists will change as was rumoured in the past few days. For the first nine qualifier announcements, three artists will be shown in a split screen of which one will be announced as finalist by the hosts off-screen. The tenth and final announcement will be as in the previous years, focusing on the hosts. There will no split screen with all remaining contestants.

Welcome from St. Jakobshalle! Tiny but shiny!

(Photos are mine.)

I will structure the liveblog in two main parts. Part one are the performances, part two are everything else that happens in the show. This is to make sure that people who don't want all contents of the show spoiled can still have that experience. Please note that this is only the first dress rehearsal. It is unclear how much of the show we will get to see except for the performances. It is likely that several other acts and performances will not be here during this first run through. Stay tuned!

PART 1: The performances

01. Iceland

The brothers' vocals are unfortunately way off in what is otherwise an extremely energetic performance. This does work as an opener but it's a shame that it's not, you know, actually good. Great camerawork and onscreen visuals but they also make it a bit more JESC - not a bad thing per se but it limits their success changes.

02. Poland

Whether you like Gaja or not, this is brilliant. Justyna's vocals are impeccable and the energy of her and the dancers is truly insane. It's a big step up from the rather messy NF performance. This went very big in the arena and is likely to get many a televote tomorrow night too. It's very kitsch of course and not for everyone, but this will work.

After the Slovenian postcard we see that there is a minor malfunction as Justyna's chords are still on stage. This gets resolved soon though.

03. Slovenia

Again a revamped NF performance. Klemen is still hanging upside down in the second chorus but in the beginning you see short home videos of him and his wife, which works really well without getting too corny. At the end he's joined on stage by his wife and it really is very touching. After all the previous energy this works so well in the running order. This is a dark horse for sure.

04. Estonia

You think this is identical to the NF performance up to a point (bar the onscreen graphics at the LED wall, Winner Cafe and Tommywood, very low expectations) BUT THEN they pretend a Tommy Cash super fan runs on stage and is first stopped by the dancers/security agents. She gets to dance a little with him before being removed. It's cute and endearing but overall this really lacks energy for some reason. This didn't work in the arena as well as it should have.

XX. Spain

Muy messy, unfortunately. Five dancers that appear at random times, an outfit change that's rather odd and hidden behind a cheap purple/red curtain and many spots in the performance that lack energy and oomph. Not sure how this will fare. Also not sure the black and white throughout the performance works. Not convinced!

05. Ukraine

I also wasn't convinced by the snippet and pictures but have to admit that the performance works really well with the song. It's some sort of psychedelic fever dream visualised with filters that make the artists initially look like holograms of sorts. It does work very well although I also fear it might be a bit too off-putting for parts of the 'general audience'. Vocals are a bit shaky and screechy sometimes, but the backings are brilliant.

06. Sweden

Does what it says on the tin. There are beautiful background projections of woods and mountains but you hardly see them on screen. More fire than in Melodifestivalen and an impressive laser show during the final chorus. It's just really well-made and yes, it will be showered with points. Sorry.

07. Portugal

The only thing I will ever remember from this is that there is a bunch of Portuguese journalists sitting in front of me who are singing along very loudly and obnoxiously (almost Dutch-like).

08. Norway

This is also mostly a carbon copy of the NF performance. Kyle starts of shakily but improves throughout . It doesn't do anything more or less than you expect it to basically. There will be an audience for this for sure.

09. Belgium

Not to sound too chauvinistic, but this was actually really good. It's a big change from the NF though. Red Sebastian starts at the front stage for the first half where he is joined by three identically clad dancers eventually. The lighting and projections are impressive, ending with a massive red crowd during a rave party. Vocally he was very much on point. I remain cautious, but am optimistic about our changes or qualification!

XX. Italy

Lucio pretends to play the piano (the longest one ever on a Eurovision stage at that too), the guitar and the harmonica. There are giant sound boxes on stage as well. Except for this, not an awful lot is happening during the performance and it's all a bit... dull? Well-positioned in the running order, but it all seems a bit half-arsed.

10. Azerbaijan

They really did try to do something nice here. Three dancers, a drummer, a guitarist and the lead singer and a very nice background with (again) red as dominant colour. Unfortunately the singer is a bit shaky in the beginning, although he does recover as the performance progresses. Again, they tried. But overall this is very dull and not convincing. The rather abrupt song ending also comes out of nowhere in the performance. Even the journalist crowd here was unsure whether the song was actually over or not.

11. San Marino

Starting to lose my patience a bit here. This also feels very empty in spite of so much happening on stage. It's actually a very static performance. No one moves around and everyone tries to create energy. But they all fail because they have so little work with in the first place. If there's one shock qualifier, it could be this although it won't be with flying colours.

12. Albania

This is what is nowadays known among the young kids as "a showstopper". I'm not the biggest fan of this, but by god, this works *so* well. A breath of fresh air after the previous songs and Beatriçe is just wonderful as a performer. We could hardly hear Kolë which felt a bit odd but hopefully that's just an arena thing. Speaking of the arena, this went VERY big here. No, this won't be for everyone but it will have its audience for sure.

13. Netherlands

This is different from what I had imagined but still very decent. Claude starts alone in close-up until after the first chorus when he is joined by two dancers and three musicians. They all disappear during the bridge during which another LED wall is driven on stage. The performance ends with Claude dancing 'together with his younger self' like in the music video. It's more artistic than energetic but is very classy and works very well. Claudes vocals are also on point this time. Goed gedaan!

14. Croatia

What Alexander-NL said about this before, but with more lights and pyro. God, this is exhausting. They really went all out on the graphics and the staging but you simply can't polish a turd. That's not to say that Marko himself is bad. In fact he's lovely and very skilled - but he also doesn't come across as likeable, unfortunately.

XX. Switzerland

It's refreshing to see how the home team kept things so minimalistic. Zoë is all alone on stage (except that she's not, she's surrounded by like 10 technicians) and there is no LED projection whatsoever - except for a request to audience members to turn on their phone light at the end, which is very effective. They try to recreate the atmosphere of the video clip with very innovative light and wind effects and it all looks truly stunning on screen. This can go very far on Saturday.

15. Cyprus

The stage show with the construction is really impressive. It is changed up all the time by the three dancers and a few stage hands that run on and off stage at exact the right time, which is so cool to see in the arena. The camerawork is very effective in what they try to convey although it is just unclear to me what this is all about and how the song and performance are aligned. This will likely qualify though.

After the last song we were all immediately told to leave. I only caught the start of the recap and that was it. The first dress rehearsal isn't shown in the media centre, so I guess this was it for the first blog!

PART 2: The rest of the show

The show opens with a video containing nature footage that is supposed to tell us that the Eurovision branding was there since the Earth's creation. Very low stakes, clearly. This culminates in a dance recital with modern dancers that all look like mini Loreens and traditional Swiss alphorn music with people in traditional clothing of all ages. A combination of the old and the new, so you will. It really does look phenomenal on stage and on screen. More traditional instruments and singing - is that Sebalter? No whistling though (luckily). The Code is there somewhere too. This really is very nice.

Next we meet the hosts, Hazel Brugger and Sandra Studer (née Simo). They thank their Swedish predecessors for memories that will last forever. They got that right. For those of you wondering, YES, we do get a snippet of Simo's 1991 performance. Hazel was still in the womb at that time, of course, as is shown.

Queue voting information, fireworks, and then we're off!

The onscreen graphics are gorgeous. The country name and artist and composer info are neatly displayed within the giant arch on stage.

For you nerds, I can also confirm that the country lower third displays the running order number, the country name AND a small Eurovision logo heart, for some reason. No, it doesn't move around like in Melfest. Missed opportunity to display Lumo, if you ask me.

The postcards show all contestants opening a postbox and finding a postcard (yes!) from a specific location in Basel to which they are all 'transported'. Very cute, if not exactly memorable of exciting. They won't distract too much from commentators' comments, which is the point, right?

We get a first break after the Estonian performance. Hazel and Sandra highlight some songs that are originally Swiss, including Chihuahua and the Chicken Dance. Yes. I know.

After the Italian performance we get our second break focusing on how props were used in Eurovision history. Of course there's a recap video. Think Dustin the Turkey, Francesco Gabbani's monkey, Subwoolfer's wolf. Everything is very recent. Margot Hielscher isn't in which is a real travesty.

Hello, how's the flow?

Guten Abend, bonsoir, buona sera, buna saira!

Refrain from what you're doing and ignore Giorgio and other gentlemen callers: the ESCNation Basel Blog is officially up and running.

What to expect? Liveblogs from the St. Jakobshalle for the first dress rehearsals on Monday, Wednesday and Friday afternoons and attempts to provide all tea and other hot beverages from within the media centre for your enjoy and entertainment.

Can KAJ hang on by the skin of their teeth or will Céline Dion catch up? Whenever the excitement gets a little bit too much for you during the coming days, just remember: It's all in your head.

Happy Off Season!

 When everything was so predictable, and there aren't any scandals to keep us busy (by that I mean real scandals like last year's jury collusion, not the usual fan-manufactured ones), we can still take pleasure in the little things, such as Harrow sharing his joy from Eurovision taking place in his home town. And that is something I wish all of you to experience once in your lifetime.

So a big thank you to our blogging team, and to you for reading and commenting. See you next year for the on-season, maybe we'll be lucky to get yet another epic Eist Lidd fir Malmö.

Happy Eurovision Party!

As Eurovision fans, we al have our origin story. That excuse or explanation as to why we fell head over heels with a ‘monument to drivel’ - whether it’s family, flags, geography or yodelling. The hook that brings us in is one thing. But what makes us stay? What makes us care enough to go to Google and carve out our space as part of the 365 days a year niche community?

For me, everything leads up to the party. The day when we as super fans get the chance to ask for the full attention of our long-suffering friends. Sure they have fun, but if we’re honest they don’t do it for themselves, they do it for us.

My first ever Eurovision party was 2003. An excellent year longwise, not an excellent year for Liverpool and UK.

A friend came over early and we made Pierogi - a Latvia delicacy that was actually delicious and successful -though I’ve never repeated the pre-event cooking session. I prepared scorecards for everyone and insisted that they were filled out studiously with notes and a final top 10 to give points to.

My Mum’s hairdresser was in town, so during the interval I got my hair cut in the kitchen. When this was finished my party guests told me that UK were ‘still’ on nil points - and like my Scouse buzzcut  - things didn’t look any better an hour later.

Fast forward 20 years, with only a handful of years where I’ve not hosted an event - and I’m back at it again. This time not in my parent’s house, but not too far away either - in a pub opposite the actual arena hosting actual Eurovision. 

A friend will be there who was at that very first party. Since then we’ve lived in 5 different countries between us, but fate has brought us back for this one. She asked if she can be spared the bureaucracy this time - so I’ve prepared a scoresheet just for her.

Over the years I’ve pulled together many questionable outfits - I’ve been Laka’s sister, a Polish milkmaid, Sofi Marinova, Yulia Samoylova, Lys Assia and Gina G on multiple occasions. Tonight Matthew, I’ll be Käärjä - thanks to an inflatable pool float and some creative thinking.

This is our night to be the centre of attention. Enjoy your night whether amongst family, Eurofamily, old or new friends or lovers - or even all of them like me! 364 days led up to today, and tomorrow we will wake up (late, sure) to reconvene for the post-mortem (who saw Poland winning?!) and be back amongst friends to do it all again.

Final Dress Rehearsal 2 (aka Jury Final)

Hi all, live from the online press centre in Amsterdam I'm trying to keep you updated on the jury rehearsal for the Grand Final of ESC 2023 in Liverpool

You're all familiar with how all the performances look, or at least should look. So I will - if the stream allows - just comment on what's striking in the performances, if anything. Car crashes, collapsing grills and other props, or excellent vocal surprises ... and all the things we haven't seen yet, including flag parade, intervals and of course the fake voting procedure.

Meanwhile what looks like two of the three drag queens from yesterday (but they might be different ones, we don't get close-ups) are doing the warm-up, counting down from 10 to 0, when the words 'Good to go' appear on screen. But apparently the producers think otherwise, so they're continuing after that. But I'm sure we'll start quickly.

And we're off! With a video introduction involving Kalush Orchestra, last year's winners from Ukraine of course. 'Stefania' is played by different musicians in different styles. We also see a metro form the Tick Tock postcard in 2014. The party continues inside the metro.

And then we are on the stage in Liverpool where the song continues. With dancers and all, but of course also Kalush Orchestra. And many others it seems. They obviously get huge cheers from the crowth. And then it's time for the flag parade! 'Superstar DJ, here we go!'. And hey ... after France we get to see and hear Go_A with 'Shum', they're in Liverpool.

Jamala makes an appearance with '1944'. Or a short fragment of it. Oh, even Tina Karol is there! Nice how they mix the Ukrainian enties with British dance classics. And then there's Verka Serduchka, she couldn't miss, could she?! Including her mum obvi.

Time for the hosts. You've seen them in action on Tuesday and Thursday but tonight they're joined by Graham Norton. Graham is the smallest on stage.

Hannah does a better job than Marlous in 1980 to explain why we are in Liverpool and not in Kiev this year.

We get a leaderboard of who has won the contest the most times! Nicely done, because obviously Ireland has seven and Sweden has six. And we know things may change this year. Also of course  🇱🇺 Luxembourg (?!) is mentioned too (with five wins in shared third place with Netherlands, UK and France), including obviously a mention of their return next year!

And then: Let the Eurovision Song Contest 2023 begin!

Austria is a brilliant opener really, to get the party going. Some feel they've been punished by being put #1, but my view is that it's not to their disadvantage. 

Portugal bounces on in red and black, definitely not killing the party mood we're in. So yes, it may not be a compliment to be put at #2, but everyone's a winner, you know! Crowth loves it no less for it :-) They don't need Luxembourg this year to get some nice votes I think.

Switzerland is still very red and black, but also blue. It doesn't bounce. But Remo gives a strong vocal performance. Nothing to worry here for them. Except maybe complaining about the running order.

Poland got by far the most Youtube views of yesterday's contestants, but that maejbe because of lots of reasons, not all very relevant. Yesterday I wasn't much impressed. I'm still not hugely impressed but it does what it wants to do I guess. I think vocally it was a bit stronger? But I think it's the first real filler of the night.

No break after Portugal this time as happened in this afternoon's rehearsal. They may have rehearsed getting the props replaced more quickly. Serbia just started and now I have a broken stream :-( Hope it will be fixed soon!

Missed part of Serbia ... anyway, like I promised, if there's hardly anything new to mention about an entry, why should I bother? I think I shouldn't bother. Just saying that he got a nice audience reaction. 

OK, first time 'for real' for La Zarra from France. I'm not a big fan of this staging, but it's quickly clear that she's giving it much more than in the rehearsal clip. But the Grande France Note: ? - it gets some what sounds like canned applause, and was still off I'm afraid. All in all, great reaction from the audience, and much stronger vocally (but not that one note).

We get the first break, but no offical commercial bumpers, so it will be mainly to get France off stage. We get a flashback to the highlights of Tuesday's and Thursday's shows.

Cyprus ... whereas Thursday I thought he was off/out of breathe singing the 'You can't break a broken heart' parts, they sound better this time. Everything still looks as good as it looked, and that helps a lot too. Nah, he sounds good, really! Great performance.

And it's the first one for real for Blanca Paloma from Spain. Or it's not, because Julia intervenes after the postcard to bring attention to all the social Eurovision channels. After a minute we're off to Spain indeed ... it was always going to be a love or hate entry. Can we expect much love for this? I honestly can't say. Last year I was totally wrong about Chanel too, so I don't dare to say if she's gonna wonning this or not. But staging is beautiful. Song may a bit long for some. And some notes a bit harsh. All in all, I'm tempted to say Europe is not going to be hugely impressed.

Another short non-commercial break with a nice look forward to JESC 2023. (insert icy.png here). It's going to happen on 26 November if you didn't know.

And I expected some reference to Terry Wogan at this point, but nope ... we go right away to Loreen from (according to Alesha) Swee-hee-den.

(Sweden) I really wanted to write about a failing grill, snowfakes and all ... but Loreen was just as amazing as Tuesday. And this comes from someone who never was a fan. But yeah, she nailed it really. (insert png again). I didn't watch every shot, I'm sorry. It looks impressive-ish just as much as it always did, but it's mainly the vocal performance that makes this the obvious winner.

another cut to the green room, so also the hosts can say 'wow', which I think is a bit over it.

Clearly Albania at this point serves as a bit of a filler here, but also one that touches the essence of ESC. You would never hear this outside ESC. Even if you wanted to. It's everything we want from Albania and she gets a lot of cheers. Unexpected, but in a way, totally cool that it's here tonight.

It's still not entirely clear for me if the trampoline jumpers  for Italy are really on stage or just on the screen. Anyway, what's the point of bringing them if you can't tell it apart form a screen projection. Anyway, they don't add much to this in my humble opinion. But it also doesn't destract too much, so well done for that. Totally decent vocally. Nice applause but nothing huge. But maybe because some people got pregnant.

Honestly haven't got too much to say about Estonia. Better applause than Italy I'd say, but then that may be mostly about their neighbour coming up next.

Finland definitely comes across much more sparkly than Tuesday, with huge help from the audience. Nothing to add to what we've already seen except that the Liverpool Arena is out of its mind.

We still haven't had a real commercial break and we won't get any now. So on to the 'second half' without interruption.

Czechia is still as impressive as it was on Tuesday, but I feel they are the biggest loser from the running order here, coming right after Finland without a break. On the other hand, it may well sound extra good to those who think Finland is just a lot of noise. Crowth is still very enthousiastic anyway.

Julia says we're halfway, but we're actually over. After a small look forward (billboard style) about what's hapening next, Julia welcomes the viewers down under and we're off to Australia. Don't use this as a pee-break (unless you don't care about Voyager) as it's really short.

Australia - nothing to add to what you've been able to see for yourselves. Not even a joke about a car crash to make here.

Audience audibly singing long with Gustaph 's first notes for Belgium which makes a good start for this. I think this is a bit overstaged with the stairs and all, but it's obviously lots of fun, and the hall loves it! I didn't see it before, but now I say: this is going to do very well with televoting!

And here's the first commercial break. So that's not doing harm to Belgium either! We get a small interval with Graham Norton who, just like Terry Wogan in 1998, also does the BBC commentary as usual. He's eating popcorn (the Noa effect?) but he asks for a pizza?! ... After that an announcement with Hannah with a reference to a former - very dairy - ESC performance.

On my tv set last Thursday Armenia sounded a bit underwhelming. Still not sure if it was my tv or the actual performance. But this is much more impressive. The dance break, I feel is a bit unncessary as the song really builds at tht point, and musically it's much of a letdown that we don't go to that supercatchy chorus immediately. But that may be just me. Very good, much good, all in all.

Moldova may be just that what many casual ESC viewers expect from ESC and even if it sounds a bit like Shum from Wish superficially, I can totally see this doing a a Trenuletul (with a thingy under one of the letters, don't remember which).

Of course there's a small break to Julia introducing the Ukraine entry. But very shortly, and surprisingly in English.

First time I see the full Ukraine performance, there's some pretty smart parts. It's hard to say anything about this, is it. Maybe I expected it to be a bit more spectacular. But then ... it's Ukraine. And it's a song I can see being much appreciated by juries. Though, on that alone it's never going to be more than lower top 10. 

Norway ... there's some serious off-key notes in the second verse. Oh and an awful screech further on. Even the scream crashed, so I missed the last 30 seconds. She gets a huge applause, but this was ... not so good, sorry.

I don't think Norway followed by Germany works very well, as they're both quite powerful/aggressive. LOTL's lead singer looks a bit like Dana International with feathers, at least the upper side. In direct comparison to Norway this works much better. I don't think Germany will be last in the televote. Or close to that. 

I can't help but feeling Lithuania is here just to give the viewers a break. And that may not even work to its disadvantage. Monika is vocally totally fine anyway! Not a big fan of the song but I enjoyed that performance.

Israel - fenomenal! Great staging / camera work and I couldn't notice any serious flaws in Noa's vocal performance. I'm not sure if we should consider this very dangerous. I made the mistake with Chanel, so I'm tempted to say: yes. Dangerous! And audience goes pretty wild again.

Totally I was totally surprised by how slick and still fun Slovenia was in that dreary second semi-final. Nothing has changed in the act or the performance. I find it hard to say. I see a surprise contender, but maybe I get carried away. Being surrounded by Israel and Croatia, I'm also confused whether that helps or not. 

Croatia ... nothing to add to this. Don't see it as the televote winner at this point, but it will get quite a lot obvi.

United Kingdom went down very well in the hall.

Now seriously, I think there wasn't much wrong with Mae's vocals. But they're just not very powerful. But this song doesn't need that anyway. Anyway, I think it may get some jury points, but no, this makes not much of an impression after all that action before. 

All four presenters get back on stage of course to explain everything about the voting. But Graham warns us: it's a long way to go before we get there.

From the recap I'd say the highlights of this ESC are Sweden and Israel, Finland a bit behind with Belgium, Slovenia and Moldova as biggest surprises. Croatia, Armenia, Italy and Ukraine would then fill the top 10. But I'm bad at predictions,  I got 13/20 of the qualifiers, so do with that what you want.

On that note, I expect very few televotes for France. Or Switzerland.

Interval number 1 is Sam Ryder with his new song 'Mountain'.

Then we get an interview with a woman who likes to say a lot of words:

anyway, tonight we don't have the real Jan Leeming. But her stand-in says a lot of words too. Nice flashback to Jan being confused about the exact location of Ralph Siegel.

After that we get a voting themed video with more historical footage, including four times zero points. And in fact, half of the 2021 televoting sequence, followed by another interview with Timur. And also the Australian commentators get a visit by Alesha.

After some references to the coronation, it's time for a second recap. 

Interval 2 is all about music from Liverpool/Merseyside. We see Mahmood singing 'Imagine' first. To be fair I wouldn't want Chanel to do this. After that it's Netta singing 'You spin me round'.  Her outfit looks a bit like the German singer and indirectly again like Dana International. But also a bit like 3 + 2. Guess you will see it tomorrow. Next is Daði singing 'Whole Again'. All performers do get quite their time, which I think is nice. I'm not as impressed with Daoi as I was with Mahmood tbf. There's lots of Gagnamagniðs on the screen behind him by the way. Next is Cornelia Jakobs singing 'I Turn To You' with an interesting choreography.

Clearly this second interval is a must-watch! Plan your pauses around it :-)

It's still not over. Flashback to Millstreet! Of course to introduce ... Sonia! Of course she sings 'Better The Devil You Know'. Then Duncan Laurence sings 'You Never Walk Alone'. Rather flatly tonight I must say, but I'd say he's holding in for tomorrow? During the last part a lot of people including hosts, but also some seemingly random people (maybe stand-ins?) enter the stage. We also see Ruslana, but only on a screen.

At this point, so right after all this it's midnight CEST or 11 pm in Liverpool. We get a third recap.

After that we see all four hosts standing behind a long desk ... but nope, it's not voting time ... yet. But they are closing the televote anyway, so we'll be close to the start of the jury voting, it seems!

We then get a video with Bjorn Ulvaes, obviously about ABBA. But a year too early, it feels? Ah, some attention for Rosa Linn! And also Sam Ryder and Duncan Laurence again. 

We see Martin Österdahl and we're good to go it seems! 

Graham and Hannah do the jury voting. Graham explains that the points tonight are fake. To which the audience disappointedly boo.

Not Italy, but Ukraine is the first country to vote. The spokesperson hopes next time UK wins, we will have an ESC in Kiev. Israel get the first douze. Italy votes second. Scoreboard graphics are very similar to those of 2021 I'd say. Points don't cover the flags. Text is black on white, though total points / points given are white on pink / pink on yellow. Dutch spokesperson (#4) is a stand-in and sounds more Dutch than Diljá. 

After five juries Albania is in the lead. But there's a disclaimer above. Niamh Kavanagh is there to shout her twelve points across the Irish Sea (and they're going to Slovenia). I'm sure Diljá speaks better Italian than John Kennedy 'from' San Marino. France has taken over the lead.

The graphics are a bit more elaborate than the last few years but nothing too extraordinary or unseen I noticed so far. Belgian spokesperson makes a joke in West Flemish. German spokesperson is not exactly Barbara and wanders out of screen and back. At the moment Italy, France, Norway, Cyprus and Slovenia are battling it out in the fake voting, but it's very close. Spain, Portugal and Serbia are still point-less. Graham is clearly a bit nervous/confused and mixing up spokesperson's names.

After 17 juries we get an interview with a female stand-in pretending to be Marco Mengoni. A commercial break for some countries. Also (a fake) La Zarra is being interviewed and Alesha has her microphones mixed up which was pretty funny.

Hatari is giving the points from Iceland, or well, this takes some time. This was pretty pointless imho. But who knows what happens tomorrow. Italy is now taking quite a lead. Loukas is again giving the Cypriot votes (to Slovenia). We'll miss the audience shouting 'Greece' tomorrow, or well, maybe they'll still shout it anyway? Anyway, he's been around for quite some time this Loukas guy. After that it's Ben Adams for Norway. Swiss votes are coming from Lugano this time! Given by Chiara Dubey. Hannah says 'Wunderbar Copenhagen', that wasn't quite how the slogan went, right? Ruth Lorenzo gives the 12 points from Benidorm to Norway, who are recently scoring very well. Ilanit will give the Israeli points tomorrow, but she seems to be in bed right now as someone else is replacing her.

Georgian spokesperson makes a statement (joke?) nobody understands about losers not drinking alcohol and Hannah's and Graham's facial expressions like 'huh? what was that about' were priceless. 'Never mind', says the guy. That was awkward, I hope he repeats it tomorrow.

Later Graham makes a small slip-up and Hannah is not having it any more :-D La Grèce awards douze points to la Tchèquie, in French. So that seems to be its official French name now. Hannah is still laughing. Lithuania is the penultimate country and as usual the host get to close, and it's Catherine Tate right in the hall, but today it's just a stand-in. 

Jury result: Italy right in front with 247, then Norway with 194 and right below France with 193. Portugal is the only one on zero points :-(

Another interview with an excited fake Marco. And after that Martin Österdahl announces that the televote is totally in and correct ... so it's time for the fake televoting sequence. (Hannah is brilliant!)

Oh noes. Portugal gets a double zero :-((( 

After Estonia got 170 to go top 5 with it, Israel gets 200-much and is the new leader. Czechian stand-in is not happy with their 60 points. Albanian one gets 11 points and copies her reaction. Poland gets only 2 points, after which Hannah reminds us that it's an emotional rollercoaster. Belgium gets 239 and overtakes Israel. But then the UK gets 294 or so and stands at 409 with five more to go.

Finland gets 7 points :-D Graham: 'Slovenia, you got 44 points. Enjoy them!'

Split-screen with Italy, Norway, France and the current leader United Kingdom. France only gets 34 points and Graham laughs sarcastically :-D

We are reminded that Kalush Orchestra will in a moment hand over the prize. Norway doesn't overtake the UK. Only Italy to go now. Graham: 'It's a rehearsal, of course it's rigged'. Italy needs 163 points to beat the UK.....

Italy gets 142!!!! So Mae Muller and the United Kingdom win this voting and therefore .... totally nothing!

So now we're off to see a fake reprise of some sorts. Anyway, I didn't notice anything special with the voting graphics other than it looking just slick. 

A male stand-in makes his way to the stage and 'mimes' to the winning song as a reprise, but actually he just stands there a bit uncomfortably on Mae's prop.

That's it for tonight. Hope you enjoyed reading! There will probably be some sort of prediction post of the blog team later today! Enjoy ESC day! :-)